Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Ahh, Valentine's Day, a guy's chance to temporarily atone for days and nights of being emotionally and/or physically unavailable in one fell swoop with candy and chocolates. When you think about it, V-D is kind of like a Yom Kippur for relationships. The best part about Valentine's Day? Only eight months until Sweetest Day! I feel obliged to point out that I just don't get this one---I don't feel the unbridled hatred I do for other holidays, just a general apathy. The apathy also doesn't appear tied to my relationship status-it's pretty much the same whether I'm seeing someone or not. (Note to ladies: The reason I am apathetic about Valentine's Day is, of course, that I am so sensitive that I don't need to set aside a special day to extol your virtues. I do it every day. I'm also a really good pretend listener. I mean listener.
Call now 847 555 HAIR)

[TV SPOILERS AHEAD]
So, the creepy ring lady on LOST tonight? Actually getting to see characters other than Jack, Kate and Sawyer? Leaving loads of unanswered questions but finding it captivating rather than irritating? To quote Mr. Pacino "Just when I thought I was out...they pull me back in. Hoo-ha!" I will admit, I am concerned that there is, at this point, almost no way to wrap this show up in a manner that resolves the plethora of unresolved issues. With the obvious exception of ninjas. Ninjas, who of course, will be led into battle by Vincent--the true heir of Alvar Hanso.

24, on the other hand, has had a few disappointing rounds. Don't get me wrong, watching poor Morris literally get drilled filled all those weird latent male tendencies towards violence quite nicely, and James Cromwell is sufficiently evil as his character from L.A. Confidential...I mean Jack's Dad. But, it does irritate me how often that show has to sacrifice character for plot. Palmer's barely-a-protest at Karen's resignation a few weeks ago, followed by the totally implausible notion that Morris would give Fayed a working detonation device this week-I understand that both choices were necessary to keep the pace moving, but both instances, particularly in Morris' case, rang pretty false, ultimately detracting from my immersion.

And now, a special Valentine's Day bonus video clip--The Colbert Report segment where Deborah Dickerson asserts that Barack Obama is, in all actuality, not black.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Oh Matt, how I long for the days gone by before you became a cynic (remeber your V-Day party in the basement?)...my fault I guess. I thought you got more of your fathers' genetic make-up than mine but I guess that was just on the exterior! While LOST was very intriguing I am getting at bit annoyed with being led around like a lost (no pun inteneded) dog. Speaking of which, what the hell ever happened to Vincent? I find it easier to suspend reality with 24 than LOST partly because of the pace and partly due to the evidence that people in government are clearly capable of both immeasurable incompetence and courage simultaneously. Loved tyhe Colbert report!!!

Unknown said...

p.s. The acting on LOST just gets better but 24 is still the same old thing, even Cromwell.

Unknown said...

I realized how ridiculous LOST was last night while attempting to watch it with someone who's never seen an episode. Lucky for the show DVD sales are incredible because I've decided the series has virtually ZERO value in syndication. Can you imagine Joe Shmo flipping by TBS two years from now and coming across last night’s episode? He would have no other choice but to assume the series was about a Scotsman who can predict the future and travel through time. And because of that he would have no other choice but to become filled with rage because it was such a blatant rip-off of HEROS. He'd probably then kick his dog who would then bite the mailman who while running away would drop the Valentine's Day card you reluctantly got for your black, I mean African, African-American girlfriend who would then break up with you and ruin society’s only chance of ever having a Jewish/African, African-American baby who could go to temple after madras.
Moral – LOST in syndication ruins lives.

Anonymous said...

Frank, you rock at life.

And that is entirely true. All of it. Dammit Matt, you should've sent her flowers.